The long journey to home

In 2007, August to be exact, Keiser and I left our first home together in Point Pleasant, NJ and headed for Iowa.  I was 18(ish) weeks pregnant with Baby Jack.  We had accepted an offer on our home, signed our papers, packed our u-haul and left.  On Monday our buyers failed to show-up for their scheduled appointment to sign their side of the papers.  We lost the sale at the same time the infamous housing bubble was bursting.  Not good.  Plans changed.  We moved in with my parents in Ames, Iowa.  Keiser started school, as planned, to work towards a post-bachelor teaching certificate.  I started work as a therapist at a local treatment center for children with psychiatric disorders.  In January 2008, still residing with my folks, we welcomed  Baby Jack Ralph into the world.  Eighteen months later (August 2009) we moved into our current rental property. It's been great.  A lovely little place (500-square-feet) where we were honored to welcome Charlie Gene into the world (literally here, in our bathroom) just this past November (2011).

Well, the time has come the time is now.  The Hillman's are homeowners again.  It has been 5-years since we left NJ and went through a lot of "drama" with our house on Barnegat Blvd.  We currently have an accepted offer on a home in Ames, Iowa.  Ironically, in the same neighborhood where, for the most part, I grew up.  It's two doors down from my grandmother and around the corner from mom and dad...hmmm, it's gonna get interesting.

Naturally, given our rocky history with housing, we are somewhat tentative to share this exciting news.  Albeit tentative, it's also super exciting for us so we are ready to share!

We originally were hoping to find a small piece of land with an older home (farmhouse) just outside of Ames.  While we did find such places, they do exist a plenty round these parts, we started to reflect on the notion of adding a commute (even a small one) to our days - when in reality we would not HAVE to do such a thing.  We decided looking in town might be wise to consider.  We found several places that were "okay."  Then we realized we needed to re-think our ideas, purpose, and focus for our home.

We chose to look at this home purchase as another stepping stone towards our "forever" home - instead of our forever home.  Surely, like many, we had hoped to find that forever place and never have to pack boxes again.  Well, we then reflected on two things.  First, we've lived in this intimate place for three years - WOW!  If we can make living here work for that long we can make anything work.  Second, we don't need more than we need.  We have been reflecting on that second one in so many aspects of our consumer-driven lives these days and trying to make significant changes in this regard.  We decided that we liked the charm of this 1920s home and the neighborhood is was nestled in (walk to ISU and around the corner from the babysitter).  Sure, it has a smaller this and a smaller that, one less of these....and so on.  However, it has was we need and that is exactly what we need - not MORE.  We are thrilled.  Thrilled with the hardwood floors, the fireplace, the large soaking tub, the sleeping porch surrounded with south-facing windows, the den with french doors, the dinning room, the fenced-yard...well, pretty much we are thrilled all around!

Here are two photos from the MLS listing.  Certainly more to come.

Welcome home Hillman Crew

Our already-fenced backyard with mature trees...Yay!

Reflections @ 6 months

Well my sweet sweet Charlie is 6-months-old.  Unbelievable that he has been blessing our days for half a year already - wow!!!  I keep reflecting on his amazing entrance into the world.  The one thing that continues to stick out to me is how many thoughts ran through my mind in such a short amount of time - mainly the amount of time between feeling that first reflexive push and him being in my arms.  Or just how many things I keep thinking about (what stands out) from his birth. I've have also been meaning to share my "why we had a homebirth" post.  I thought I'd take a moment, on the occasion of Charlie's half-year birthday, to share these thoughts and reflections.

Why we had a homebirth:

1. It is safe

Yep, it's true.  In fact, some studies have demonstrated that planned homebirth is actually SAFER than hospital birth.

2. It's respectful and values me, my body, my birth, and my family

I have never experienced more holistic and respectful medical care as I did from Willowsong when I was pregnant, birthing, and postpartum.  Every woman and every family should feel this honored by their providers!

3. I trust birth - I trust my body

I believe that God did not make a mistake when he made my body (and all womens' bodies).  I trust that my body is fully capable of giving birth.  Therefore, I do not approach birth with fear, but rather with respect and as honor to be able to experience.

I did  not know homebirth was an option for me when I was pregnant with Jack; however, I can't say what I would have done if I did know.  I had a great birth with Jack.  My decision to have a homebirth had nothing - NOTHING - to do with a negative hospital experience or any birth trauma.  Simply put, I knew that birth could be different than it was in a hospital.  The hospital is for sick people and if I became a sick person during my pregnancy or labor I was glad we have care for those situations.  However, normal pregnancy and normal birth need not occur in such a setting to be a safe and amazing experience.

There you have it, the short-hand version of why we chose homebirth!

Stand-Out Birth Reflections: 

1. Call the midwives sooner!  I hadn't had my 37 week appoint yet.  I did not yet know the "rules" of when to call, why to call, how many times to call, etc.  I got all nervous and twitchy about "bothering" the midwives too much so I certainly might have hesitated a bit in making the call to come.  I knew the midwives had just been at another birth and it was the middle of the night.  One never knows how long labor will take, so I thought it best to let everyone get rest....oops!  If there is a next time, I'll would be more prepared to say "this is it."  It has become really important to be to defend the midwives in this.  They were not the reason they were not there - I was.  I did not call in time, period. 
2. There was never any fear.  Anytime I tell anyone that I had Charlie accidentally unattended in the bathroom they typically immediately ask me if I "freaked out."  Nope, never, not once.  The house and the birth were calm and peaceful.  No rushing, no screaming, no panic, just peace.  The lights were off, the house was quiet and it stayed that way in the house for several days of buffer.  I am very proud of this gentle, peaceful, and calm welcoming-to-the-world space we created and maintained for Charlie. 
3. I was present.  I specifically remember the moment when I felt his head being born and I remember saying to myself, "This is it, this is your birth, Enjoy it.  Live it.  Experience it. Be present."  I remember his head having been born and holding it in my hands and saying, "it's okay, I've got you baby."  I remember hearing my sister say, "it's a boy" and holding him in my arms.  I remember so many little details - precious details of precious moments.  

It might not have gone exactly as planned, but it was just as it should be and I could not be happier!  I am certain that I will continue to joyfully reflect on the early morning hours of November 15th for a lifetime.  

This moment

{this moment } A Friday tradition. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A single, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor, and remember. Enjoy!

He's 5-months

Yep, it's true he's 5-months old.  Time flies is an understatement.  Loving every minute of it! 

I love his little hands

and his little smile

and his silly squirmies

and his eyes (which is where he looks the most like his father)!

and his drool, yes, I even love his drool

I love you times infinity Charlie Gene, my handsome. 

This Moment

{this moment } A Friday tradition. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A single, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor, and remember. Enjoy!  

This Moment

{this moment } A Friday tradition. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A single, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor, and remember. Enjoy!  

4-years & 4-months

Charlie's 5 months tomorrow.  I thought I'd snag a shot (cell phone) to remember when my boys were 4-years-old and 4-months-old.  Beautiful kiddos aren't they?